I was doing my daily travel around the blog world and I came across two touching posts. First there was this post by Robyn at Robyn’s World, where she talked about her grandma had passed away today. Then there was Also this one by Kasey @ All Things Mama about how today is the anniversary of her mother’s passing. I sat here and I just cried because I know how it feels to lose someone so special as a grandma (and in many ways she was like my mother). It’s hard because you don’t realize how special they are until it’s their time to move on. Of course with my birthday today and it being a 18 months since I lost my grandma two days later it has hit me pretty hard, and I think it always will.
Of course it also makes me extremely guilty for not getting to spend time with my paternal grandparents due to the feeling of their time will come as well. Also, I sadly don’t know how to be around my other grandpa since my grandma left because well we’ve never dealt with him other than to ask for a push up, cookies, or to stay the night. So now I’m left with the feeling of what do I say to someone I’ve never really talked to on any real level? It makes me very sad.
Then there is the feeling of my entire world crumble right underneath me. I’ve always felt like I had a huge family because the holidays consisted of me and my 2 siblings, my mother, my uncle, aunt, 3 cousins, my aunt’s siblings, my Grandpa’s sister and brother and their spouses and I just remember the house full of noise, the ‘boys’ parked in front of the sports game and Grandma running around the kitchen afraid that the food wouldn’t be done. When in reality she was done early and most of it was cold by the time everyone ate. My hubby always said he’d never get use to the cold food, though I told him she does own a microwave, and I realized that while it was cold, it was always the best food ever. I always couldn’t wait to get over there and start eating. No one ever complained either and there were usually not that many leftovers so she was doing something right.
Plus she always had her house decorated for Christmas, Easter, Halloween, and Thanksgiving. Her big bay window housed many holiday scenary and us grandkids (and great grandkids) loved to go and rearrange it how we thought it should be. I know she always got a laugh out of it. I also remember quite a few times her asking us to help get the big lighted ornaments out of the attic, only for her to shout down from the ladder “Watch out for the mice/rats that may be dead/up here!” That was always a ‘fun’ time for sure lol.
So many good stories I could really go on forever, but no one wants that so I’ll stop here. It’s my birthday (officially in an hour and a half lol) and I’ve been neglecting to go out to the cemetery and see her, which I’m doing today. I know part of it is because it’s so hard to deal with when I leave, but I need to get out there more before it snows because it’s always a calming place for me, almost like a check your problems at the car door kinda thing. Weird I know but what can I say? I’ve always been an odd ball. So I hope everyone has a great Halloween and gets lots of sugar. Also, make sure you give your grandparents, spouse, kids, and loved ones an extra hug today just to let them know you love them, as if they already didn’t know.
creativelyb 