Wait wait wait! Good-bye seems so …. final so instead I’ll start over and say “See you later baby brother!” It’s hard to believe that it’s been a whole week since I last seen my brother. See I wanted this to post the day he left but I was so sad over it that I just couldn’t get the words to come out at the time. My brother and I are 8 years apart, add that to the fact of that awkward boy stage ALL boys go through, it made it hard for me to actually get along with my brother. I was also the mother in the house once he started elementary school. Our mother worked mostly nights during the week/weekend and my father did as well. I was the one that came home right after school everyday to try and make sure the kids had their homework done and their share from the list of chores our mother left us to do everyday. Of course they usually left the chores up to me because well no matter what I was in trouble if they didn’t get it done. I didn’t get to hang out with friends my age, or even ask if I wanted to try out for sports during middle/high school because I knew I had to be there to help the kids get in after school. That was my unpaid job. Plus my mother has a habit of playing favoritism and it was clear that the ‘pecking order’ in our was my sister, my brother, and me way at the bottom of the totem pole. I don’t know if it had to do with my mother being a teen parent, my biological father being a piece of shit, or what the reason was for me feeling like such an outcast in my family because when ever it was brought up, the blame went on the siblings and never my mother. It’s sad to say she even pitted us against each other. It was just the last 3 years since I’ve cut her out of my life that I’ve gotten along with my sister and this past May my brother turned 18 and seemed to outgrow his awkward boy stage. We were finally starting to get along and get to be close siblings and now he’s left me …. for the army.
I’m excited for him because honestly other than his family and beautiful girlfriend, there isn’t much out here for him. You’re considered having a great job if you can get into the local Lowe’s Distribution Center or even Cadbury’s. Other than that it’s Walmart and the likes. Of course he could go to college but neither of our parents can afford it and I know he’s got a better chance of going with the Army’s help because then he knows he’ll be able to use what he goes for and it gives him some time to think about what he wants to go for. I just can’t say enough how proud of him I am. I hope he knows that. I know I only heard it around my grandparents and now that my grandma is gone I rarely hear it and want to make sure he knows that at least someone in our family is very proud of him and can’t wait to see where this journey in his life takes him. He’s also such a big influence on Oj. He loves him and definitely looks up to him. I can’t tell you how many times in the day he tells me he’s going to be an army person just like his Uncle, and honestly I couldn’t think of a better role model for him. If that’s what he wants to do when he grows up I’ll be a sad mama but I def won’t be squashing his dreams.
While this took a few different turns than I expected I think you get what my jumbled brain is trying to say. I love you Bug, and am so very proud of you. We’re all counting down the days until we get mail from you, a text/phone call, and the ever so important visit home. Stay safe and I’ll see you soon!
love your Sister & Nephewfa
creativelyb 